I feel really accomplished. i got my papers done , and i'm not failing out of school.. despite missing 2 continuous weeks of class. by the grace of god, that is the only way.
I should be doing homework.
ACTUALLY i should be in Psych, but the bitch dropped me. I have issues and its the Psych teacher who can't understand. lol thats hilariously.
Feeling very weird about a lot of things.
Feel like I'm almost trying to hard with some people. Can convince anyone to reach out or even talk to you i guess. Can't go back and make different choices.. i guess you just have to prove yourself.
i was thinking about love.
I think i had it all wrong.
Or maybe I'm just insane.
I always felt that once i let myself finally love someone else completely, no matter the situation,. that in the end love would over come anything. That once i decided it was unconditional instead of conditional i thought i would be forever. And if I'm right..either I'm fucked or i donno..
I was just thinking about that because i woke up to Captain and Tanel today
"Love, Love will keep us together, think of me babe whenever.. "
Nothing is like boy bands hypnotized it to be.
i shouldn't blame others.
Its me.
Kind of feel unlovable.
Or even possible just not enough.
I'm great but , not great enough to fight for.
I love you but, its conditional.
I love you within in this box, and if something fucked happens.. i won't remember we are an anomaly.. I'll just move on.
I love until...
I will wait...
This is just the way i am, but i expect you to change.
If you were prettier , thinner , smarter, funnier, cuter ,sexier.. then maybe this oould have worked.
I feel like i hear those things a lot, when i all i want to hear is .
I love you not matter what.
and i want someone to mean it.
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